Click here to schedule a session to see if coaching is a good fit for you or give us a ring: 1.800.526.6038

My daughter and I share a love of Greek and Roman mythology. We are currently reading “The Mark of Athena,” the third installment of Rick Riordan’s “The Heroes of Olympus.”  It is such great material and rich with modern interpretations of the stories.

Percy Jackson, a demigod (son of Poseidon and a mortal) and one of the main heroes in the book series, is confronted with a particularly challenging quest.  Following a confrontation with another demigod in which Percy very well could have been killed, he begins to question his power…and himself. Eerily like many leaders in top organizations I work with on a daily basis. 

“Percy didn’t feel powerful.  The more heroic stuff he did, the more he realized how limited he was.  He felt like a fraud. ‘I’m not as great as you think,’ he wanted to warn his friends. Maybe that’s why he had started to fear suffocation.  It wasn’t so much drowning in the earth or the sea, but the feeling that he was sinking into too many expectations, literally getting in over his head.”

When I read Percy’s rumination I flashed back to a conversation I had with a CEO of an organization last year. Much of the business’s growth had been meteoric and his “reputation” had grown with similar speed -- to almost cult like proportions.

His ego reveled in being held in such high regard, but through our discussions he acknowledged he was quaking inside, “Just waiting for them to see who I really am and for it all to fall apart!”

As his external world seemed to improve his internal world deteriorated. This leader found himself closing down and trying to control more and more.  He was less open to comments from his executive team, often making unilateral decisions without consulting them.  He discounted information that he did not agree with. He was cutting himself off -- suffocating himself!

He began to lose touch with the values that anchored his initial success, replacing them with others’ expectations. His compass no longer pointed to his “true north,” and he began to lose his way.

We see it constantly in the news -- General Patraeus, Eliot Spitzer, and the Secret Service detail in Columbia, to name just a few leaders (or those considered leaders in their field). They drowned in others’ expectations or projections of greatness, leading to poor judgment and a belief to some extent of being “above the law.”

When a CEO (or any leader) loses their way, it has a ripple effect throughout the organization, their family, and their entire community! The collateral damage is immense.

Who else do you know who responds to feelings of vulnerability and inadequacy with greater levels of denial, self-importance, and constriction?  We all know someone who fits that profile...they might even be staring at us in the mirror in the morning.

The remedy is a loving, tough, trusting, outside advisor. A person who calls it like they see it and says the things that a person often doesn’t want to hear. Luckily, Percy Jackson had his demigod friends as trusted advisors to help him find his way.

Who do you have?

Commit to getting your own advisor (it could be an executive coach, a mentor, or a trusted friend), or you may run the risk of becoming a self destructive high performer. Leadership is a challenging path that all of us need help navigating. Make sure that you have a support system that will keep you from a path like Percy’s.

Oh, and that CEO I had the discussion with…he’s still looking for work.


©2013 and beyond Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.

It’s true. You may not know it. You may not want to own it. But it is true.

All of the following facts come from the scientific community; folks who study the brain. Here’s the reality:

•     We have 60,000 thoughts a day.
•     95% of these thoughts are the same ones we had yesterday.
•     71% of these thoughts are NEGATIVE!

What???

The reality is…we are talking ourselves into failure!

YOU are your greatest foe.

YOU own your thoughts.

YOU can change them!

It’s all about awareness…

Here are some techniques to shift this destructive cycle:

•     Own it! Say to yourself: “I own my thoughts, no one else.” This is a major shift which brings the power and ownership back to you. You, no one else, owns your thoughts. Look inside for the answers, not outside.
•     Start acknowledging each negative thought you have. Stop (mentally) and soak in the thought. Don’t avoid it. Stuffing it back inside is like continually putting pop back into a bottle. At some point it is going to explode. The same will happen with you.
•     Close your eyes (stay with me here, this really works). Imagine clouds floating in the sky. Now place your negative thought on a cloud. Send it good thoughts. Thank it for the awareness lesson it provided. Tell it you don’t need it any longer. Watch it drift away.

Try doing this for just one day. See how you feel. See if your thoughts start to change. If you keep this up you will DEFINTELY change your thoughts, which in turn leads to a change in your actions.

If you truly want to change your patterns of behavior you first have to change your thoughts. They are the building blocks for everything.

This negative self talk is your ego’s way of trying to keep you small. Don’t let it! YOU own your thoughts, not your ego. Take back ownership of them, and…

TALK YOURSELF INTO SUCCESS!

P.S. - If I see any of your words on a cloud I will make sure they continue on their journey.  ;-) 


Want to know more about Executive Coaching? Click here.



© 2013 and beyond. Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.

Due to the amazing demand for the complimentary public service training we do each month, we have created a YouTube Channel where you can access all of the previous training webinars dating back to 2012. These are all complimentary. Please subscribe to our channel so that you will be notified automatically when we post new videos. Enjoy!

Here's the link to our special YouTube Channel:  


You can register for the webinars here.

*************************************************************************

Please join Gary Henson and me as we take on the biggest issues in the coaching industry. This is a free public service program we offer each month. It is lively, provocative, and packed with helpful information!

We all know the kind of conversation I’m talking about.  The kind you would gladly trade for a root canal at your favorite dentist or that “routine” exam by your proctologist. Yes, anything but that conversation!

Most of us will wait until the emotion surrounding the conversation becomes so heated or toxic that when we do finally say what is needed, the true message is hidden in anger, frustration and disappointment.

What is the “true message?”

Is it a litany of the wrongs the person has committed?

Is it a list of everything the person didn’t do that they should have?

In other words, is the “true message” focused on how the person has failed in your eyes?

Unfortunately, usually the answer to all these questions is “yes,” when it should be a resounding “NO!”

A “crucial conversation” is nothing more than a powerful opportunity to convey our current concerns to someone whom we care for greatly.

Did you get that?  We have “crucial conversations” out of our intense caring for another – otherwise why expend the energy?

How much more effective might our conversation be if we perceive it not as a negative thing, but the opportunity for a “powerful conversation” with someone we care about?

How much more effective might our conversation be, if we didn’t shirk away and become complicit in the difficulty the conversation needs to address (because the less we say the more complicit we are)?

True servant leaders will hold a powerful conversation using these steps:

• The night before the conversation write down all the reasons you care for the other person.
• Then write down what the most positive outcome looks like – what would each of you walk away with?
• Just before the conversation review #1 and #2, take three deep breaths, and smile.
• Begin the conversation with something like “I wanted to meet with you today because I am very concerned about   you.” End the conversation with “Thank you for taking your time to meet with me today and thank you for being a part of this resolution.”
• Follow up the conversation with some correspondence reaffirming your commitment to the person and the pathway agreed upon.

Take responsibility for having the right approach, and these “crucial conversations” will become a powerful interaction that benefits both parties.

*Find the classic book Crucial Conversations by Patterson, et al. here.



© 2013 and beyond Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.

BIG NEWS TODAY!

 

We just received word that our flagship Executive Coaching Training Program (CMEC) was approved by the International Coach Federation! We can now award 15 CCEUs (credit hours) toward coaching certifications with the ICF. This is a wonderful compliment to our SHRM certifications.

This is such a beautiful reflection on our entire team. Congratulations to all of you!

Many thanks to all of you for your support over the years. We are so blessed…

You can find details here:

http://www.executivecoachinguniversity.com/

Warmly,

Drayton

Founder and CEO

www.RescueInstitute.org

www.ExecutiveCoachingUniversity.com

All of your employees are happy and productive, right?  Thought so…

According to Gallop (and other leading survey firms) here is the reality:

1. 75% of people wished they had a different job.
2. 51% of “A” workers are actively looking for a different job.
3. Worker productivity is only at 33%.
4. Lack of engagement costs U.S. businesses over $385 BILLION a year!
5. 80% of people NEVER use their greatest gifts at work.

What do you think of these smelling salts?!

Coaching can address all of these issues…in fact; it may well be the ONLY thing that can cure these workplace “ills.”

If you don’t have a coaching strategy in your organization, I can guarantee you one thing—these statistics will not go down…

Coaching is the “cure.” Isn’t it time you used coaching to focus on your most important asset…your people?

 

A. Drayton Boylston

Founder and CEO

Executive Coaching University



© 2013 and beyond Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.

 

Are Leading or just Managing?

• More than two million workers say their bosses are so overworked they don’t really have time to manage their staff properly.
• 75% of people wished they had another job.
• 80% of people never use their greatest gifts at work.

Pretty sad facts.  

Guess what? They more than likely apply to your organization too.

And...

If you manage people, you own this!

What’s happening within our workforce to make these statistics a reality? 

In the United States employee engagement only averages 30%. That's it.  

Why?

It comes down to poor leadership. 

We have spent so much energy creating “good managers” that we have become disengaged with what it means to be a good leader.

Managing comes from a need to produce an outcome, which of course, is important. However, when we can move to a place of leading those around us the organizational momentum transforms.  More than anything employees want to make a contribution. Once they feel that they are, they stay...and they stay engaged. Which boosts your bottom line.

• Leading is about developing the soft skills that are required to inspire and motivate people.

• Managing is about possessing the technical skills required in order to get a job done.

If you have the management skills without the leadership skills your career will plateau at some point. That is a fact.

The soft skills that good leaders possess are going to be in high demand as the battle for top talent continues to increase. Are you ready?

 

Click here to find out more about Jenna.

Want to learn how to become a better leader? Click here for details.

Coaching In The Workplace - Training for Executives, Managers, and HR Professionals



© 2014 and beyond Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.

I was meeting the other day with a new corporate client.  This young woman was an up and coming executive within the health care industry.  We had just begun our work together, with this being our second meeting.

While our time together progressed, my client must have glanced towards, or checked in some way, her “smart phone” three or four times over the course of our first fifteen minutes.

I commented on her split attention and asked her to turn off the phone and just be focused on our time together for the next forty five minutes – fully focused upon our work.  The look on her face would have lead someone not knowing my request, to think I had asked her to do something exceptionally distasteful…maybe even illegal!

Through our discussion around my request it became quite clear that she had NEVER turned off her phone – it was always on.  This meant she was always connected, always available, always “on.”

She explained that this level of being available and connected was the status quo at her corporation and essentially had been the status quo since she was at University.  “What if I miss something really important?” she asked. “I’m not productive if I’m not juggling a number of issues, projects, or conversations at once!” she stated.

This multitasking misconception arises quite often, especially with high performers who see their success as driven by the ability to do many tasks at the same time.

Yet, there is a downside to always being “on.”  Consider:

• “Attention Deficit Trait,” a new condition rampant in the business world, which mimics Attention Deficit Disorder and results from extreme multitasking behavior.
• Researchers at the University of California found it took workers on average, 25 minutes to recover focus and attention after interruptions such as phone calls or answering email.
• Dr. Rene Marois of Vanderbilt University found evidence of a “response selection bottleneck” that occurs in the brain when it is forced to respond to multiple tasks.  This results in diminished productivity.
• In a 2008, a piece within the New York Times by Jonathan B. Spira, an analyst with the business research firm Basex, “estimated that extreme multitasking – information overload – costs the U.S. economy $ 650 billion a year in lost productivity.”  And that was in 2008!

Is it possible that any of the above might contribute to the 33% worker productivity rate in the U.S? 33%!!!

There are also other, more personal costs.  This particular client was referred to me due to increasing conflicts between her staff and those in her chain of command – she had become “hard to work with” and was close to losing the job she so valued.

Additionally, her marriage was on the verge of divorce and she had been diagnosed with digestive/intestinal issues primarily caused by stress.

Coincidence?  Not likely!

Sound familiar?  Chances are if you are reading this then you have experienced, or know someone close to you who has experienced, a very similar chain of events.

Take time to focus within the moment, express gratitude, and disconnect at least once daily.  You will find you are actually more productive, healthier, and happier.  Then lead all those around you to do the same!

 

Greg Styles

Director of Special Projects

Executive Coaching University

© 2013 and beyond Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.

What skills does it take? How is it done? What would a “Coaching Culture” look like? What kind of manager can make the transition?

The question is often asked - “Could our Managers/Leaders become good Coaches?” The answer is - Maybe.

Here’s the reality - Most managers in corporate America are good technicians at what they do. They typically have deficiencies in the “soft skills” area.

Here is where a big distinction needs to be made:

There is a HUGE difference between Leaders and Managers. The difference is that Leaders have mastered the soft/people skills necessary to inspire people to work up to their full potential. Managers often have solid technical skills but don’t inspire others to work toward a collective goal. A symptom of a typical manager is that their people are often in need of a “task with consequences” approach to their work vs. leaders who inspire self motivation for the good of the cause.

Here are the skills that Coaching takes:

1. Desire - a true desire to help others succeed.

2. Awareness - a trust in ones’ intuitive “gut.”
 
3. Focus - on the individual and their challenges vs. a need to “solve” things for others.

4. Listening - a sincere desire to truly hear what others are saying.

A Coaching culture is typified by these attributes:

1. Respect - you would see interactions that respect the word of the individual.

2. Worth - individuals within these cultures feel valued and appreciated.

3. Real Communication - not your typical “force fed” communication. You would see fully duplexed communication throughout the ranks.

4. Stability and progress - these cultures display more stability and retain their best people better than others. That leads to greater personal and business success.


Corporate Leaders that can make the transition to Coach are those that truly believe in investing in the individual - in time and money. It takes a sincere desire and belief that investments made in people pay off for the company.

Does this resonate with you?

Take good care,



Drayton Boylston

Founder and CEO - Executive Coaching University

http://www.ExecutiveCoachingUniversity.com

© 2013 and beyond Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.

by Drayton Boylston

There is much confusion about what Coaching is- and isn’t. Many consulting firms have simply gone through their marketing materials and changed the word “consulting” to “coaching.” For many in the business world, that sums up what they perceive Coaching to be, a new word for consulting.

Nothing could be farther from the truth!

.. Coaching IS NOT about giving advice or consulting. It is not about mentoring. It is not about “helping” others by providing solutions to problems.

.. It IS about working intensely with people, utilizing provocative and powerful questions, to enable people to find answers themselves. At its essence, Coaching is about equipping people with the tools to discern the real issues at work and then to employ the right actions to best deal with the realities that they face.

.. Coaching is not therapy. Coaching should not go anywhere near what is considered the domain of therapists and psychologists. If it does, it’s not coaching. Coaching is not about the past- it is about the present- and the future. Good Coaches know when they are getting near the areas where others need to be called in- and do so.

.. While some Coaching can appear to be ethereal and too “out there” for companies, that is a much different type of Coaching (Life Coaching). There is a distinct form of Executive Coaching that is used in the corporate environment. It is directly tied to personal improvement and increased productivity that in turn pays off handsomely for the organization.

.. Coaching does not “fix” people. It is rare that Coaching can be deployed to “fix” those that deem to be in need of a quick change by their manager.

.. Coaching can have dramatic short term impact. But the reality is that it will take from 6-12 months of quality Coaching to make sustainable changes. Those that tell you that it can be done quicker are not well informed.

.. Coaching is about individual planning, goal setting, and achievement. It’s also about personal discovery and enlightenment. It is about realizing one’s full potential.

With all that being said, Coaching is about so many things that would benefit every company. Coaching helps create stronger and more productive people that are more valuable to the organization!

Be well,

Drayton Boylston
Founder and CEO - Rescue Institute, Executive Coaching University

http://www.executivecoachinguniversity.com

© 2013 and beyond Executive Coaching University. All rights reserved.